


beyond pineapple village

by Little Keplerette (classycloudcuckoolanderclasso)



Category: Cookie Run (Video Game)
Genre: an attempt was made, and cinnamon is reportedly nonbinary, but cinnamon's pronouns are he/him and they/them, here cinnamon IS nonbinary and identifies as such (not that it ever really comes up), okay tumblr is really big on like pronoun stuff, yknow the drill
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-08
Updated: 2018-03-08
Packaged: 2019-03-28 17:15:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,245
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13908600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/classycloudcuckoolanderclasso/pseuds/Little%20Keplerette
Summary: Adventurer goes looking for the treasure of Primeval Jungle. Instead, he finds a mansion, and one of the prettiest women he's ever seen.He was so fucking boned.





	beyond pineapple village

Tiger Lily had warned him against it, she really had.

They weren't exactly on good terms all the time, seeing as that he always set off the most complicated traps she set up, but she had still warned him against exploring further into Primeval Jungle. She'd caught him snooping around Pineapple Village, and when she'd asked why, he'd admitted that he was adventuring.

"You... do not adventure here." Tiger Lily stood, tall and intimidating next to Adventurer. He was pretty tall himself, but not as tall as the six foot seven Tiger Lily. She wasn't in her usual aggressive stance, but her grip on her spear was tighter than usual, catlike pupils thin. "Not normally..."

Adventurer rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. "Yeah, I know, I know... but someone said there was somethin' out here past the Pineapple Village - something big. And, well, y'know me? It's in my name-"

"Leave." He gulped as the tall woman swung her spear an inch from his neck, pointing it at his throat. "Do not... adventure here..."

"But I've been to the Pineapple Village tons o' times, what makes this any different?!" He was genuinely confused, slowly pushing the spear down and away from his throat.

Orange eyes flashed dangerously. "Don't... ask questions... you don't want to know... the answers to." Was that... concern in her eyes? "Go home, Adventurer."

"..."

He left that day, unsatisfied with the day's adventure, but brimming with curiosity over her ominous words.  _So there IS something beyond the Pineapple Village... but what could it be that's got even Tiger Lily, one of the fiercest people I know, concerned for my wellbeing?_

-=-

"I swear, there's gotta be somethin' out there if Tiger Lily's so damn adamant on keepin' it away from me."

Mint Choco gave Adventurer an amused look, but didn't reply, seeing as that he was in the middle of violin practice. With a moody grumble, Adventurer swiped the glass of grape juice from an indignant Vampire and took a swig before shoving the glass back at him, waving his hand. "Minty. Minty, y'ain't listenin' to me. Did you hear what I said?"

"Let him finish," Cinnamon waved him off with a laugh, shuffling his cards before returning them to his hat. Cinnamon Bunny sniffled impatiently, knocking over the hat, and with a sigh, Cinnamon righted it, just as Mint Choco finished with a flourish, bowing to the small audience he had - which was basically just Adventurer, Vampire, Cinnamon, and Cocoa. "There, see, was waiting so hard?"

"You're one to talk," Adventurer grumbled, slumping down in his seat. "Y'can't even wait for others to finish their baths before you show them card tricks."

"That was a one time thing!"

Once Mint Choco finished, he set his violin down, and took a seat across from Adventurer and Vampire next to Cinnamon, taking a glass of grape juice for himself and taking a small sip. "So. Adventurer. About Tiger Lily and Pineapple Village?"

"Right!" Adventurer slammed his fists on the coffee table, startling Marshmallow Hamster into darting into Cocoa's waiting arms. The girl nuzzled her pet affectionately as the hamster glared at Adventurer. "There  _has_ to be somethin' out there. She wouldn't be tellin' me to basically fuck off if there wasn't anythin' there! Right?!"

Mint Choco gave Cinnamon an amused glance before looking back at Adventurer. "Mm-hm. Go on."

"It all adds up!" The adventurer stood up, and began pacing around the room, much to his friends' amusement. His hands waved around for emphasis as he muttered, half to himself and half to the others, "I know we don't get along, but I swear on Ginger Claus, there was concern in those catlike eyes of hers-"

"Or she was thinking how much meat she could get out of you for Meat King." Vampire offered dryly.

"Ew." Cocoa wrinkled her nose adorably. "Don't say that, Tiger Lily's not like that."

"- and I'm gonna find out what the actual fuck is beyond the walls of Pineapple Village, or so help me, I'm going to eat Backpacky!" At the whimper, he amended, "I'm jokin'. I won't eat you, Backpacky. But I  _am_ gonna find out what's beyond those god damn trees if it's the last thing I do!"

Cinnamon couldn't help but crack a smile, one he shared with Mint Choco, before looking back at Adventurer. "Okay, if you say so. Just don't say she didn't warn you."

"You guys ain't gonna stop me?" Adventurer suddenly stopped, suspicious. "... You guys know somethin' about what's beyond there."

Vampire tilted his glass to the side slightly, sifting the juice in it every now and then. "Buttercream Choco knows. But he'll never tell. And you can't ask Cheesecake either, 'cause she doesn't know about it." He took a sip before sighing. "I know what's out there, but if Cinnamon and Mint aren't telling you, then I'm not telling you either."

"Oh,  _come on!_ " Adventurer whined. "Is it dangerous?!"

"Probably." Mint Choco laughed.

"Scary?!"

"Sometimes." Vampire conceded.

"IS IT SOMETHIN' WORTH ADVENTURIN' FOR?!"

Cocoa pondered it, and then, much to everyone's surprise, gave him a sweet smile. "Absolutely. Your heart will absolutely get stolen away by the treasure you'll find there."

"Cocoa!" Cinnamon was suddenly a  _lot_ less comfortable.

"It's true, though!" Cocoa giggled as Adventurer pumped his fist, declaring, "That's it! I'm adventurin' past Pineapple Village! I'm gonna get that treasure if it's the last thing I do!" And with that, he snagged Backpacky, and ran out of the room, leaving the four friends to their own devices once more.

Cinnamon whirled around to face her. "What were you thinking, saying that to him?"

"We all know what's waiting for him there beyond Pineapple Village, especially you, Cinnamon." Cocoa tickled the underside of Marshmallow Hamster's chin. "I found no reason to lie to him."

"Did you  _have_ to say his heart would get stolen away, though?"

"Knowing his type? Absolutely."

-=-

Tiger Lily had warned him against it, she really had.

But here he was, sneaking past Pineapple Village, deep into the depths of Primeval Jungle, searching for a treasure that supposedly existed, that Cocoa believed would steal his heart away. And he believed her - Cocoa rarely lied, and she was one of the sweetest people he knew. He trusted her judgment, and with her judgment, he made the decision to explore the darkest recesses of Primeval Jungle.

Dead leaves crunching below his boots, Adventurer walked slowly and carefully, wary of anything that could jump out at him. The foliage seemed to thin out to the point that some trees were nearly bare, creating an eerie, Halloween-like effect. It really didn't help that he could've sworn he saw a ghost every now and then, darting between the trunks of the trees and playing peek-a-boo with his nerves. Stupid nerves. Not that he was  _scared_ \- he was Adventurer, and he'd seen some shit. To be scared of ghosts by this point was stupid. The idea of ghosts was stupid. This was stupid. Oh my God this was stupid.

Wait. What was that?

His ears pricked at the sound of what was... a child sobbing? What the actual fuck? Why would a sobbing child be in the middle of the Primeval Jungle? What kind of sick freak left a child in the middle of the Primeval Jungle?!

"Son of a-" Adventurer cursed - the treasure would have to wait. He promised he'd save  _every_ cookie, goddamnit. "Me and my big mouth."

Adjusting his adventuring gear, he trudged in the direction of the crying, trying to make himself known to the child through his footsteps without seeming like a big scary monster out to probably eat them. Which wasn't too difficult, but the child seemed to be on the move, because the crying grew fainter, then louder, and then seemed to come from another direction entirely.  _What the actual fuck?_ Adventurer retraced his steps a little before heading in a different direction, chasing after the crying, until finally, he saw something moving, shifting, and shaking with what seemed to be sobs.  _Aha!_

"Hey there, kid-" Adventurer knelt down, ready to place a hand on the child's shoulder, when they whirled around, and screamed, right in his face.

And all hell suddenly broke loose.

Before he knew it, he was being swarmed by ghosts -  _actual fucking ghosts and not just figments of imagination -_ and this was  _not_ what he fucking signed up for, for the love of Ginger Claus, holy fucking god. Backpacky hiccuped out a bat, which Adventurer used to swing at the ghosts, as the child cowered in front of him, and while it wasn't doing anything to the ghosts, it  _was_ doing wonders for the child's trust in him, because he soon felt arms wrapping around his leg, clinging to him tightly, and when he looked down, it was the child - a little girl, from the looks of it -, eyes shut tightly, clinging to his leg and to her doll.

"Alright, you ghosty white shits, out of the goddamn way," Adventurer swore, swinging the bat at them. "I got a hand full of bat, an arm full of swing, and a mouth full of yellin', and I bet you sure as hell don't wanna be subject to that, so get lost! Scram!" He swung the bat some more at them, until finally, the ghosts decided that bothering him was pointless, and left him and the child alone. Once he was certain the ghosts were gone, he handed the bat back over to Backpacky, who... basically swallowed it whole, before tentatively patting the little girl's head. "Hey. They're gone now. It's okay."

"Scary... what if they come back...? It's so scary here..." The girl quivered.

 _Aw geez._ Adventurer hated to admit it, but he had a soft spot for children. With a reassuring smile, he knelt down so that he was nearly eye to eye with the little girl, gently moving her doll close to her chest and making her hold it closely -  _oh my god her hands were so fucking tiny, so precious...!_ "They won't come back, not with me around. Don't you worry 'bout a thing, sweetheart." He gave her a smile. "I'm here."

The little girl looked up at him, and oh my God. He was a goner. This little girl? Had him wrapped around her little finger now. He would literally do anything for her. "... Okay..."

"Smile now, alright?" Adventurer smiled at her. "No need for crying anymore. I'm Adventurer, you?"

**_"ONION!"_ **

Aaaaaaaand now he was upside down in mid-air.

... That sounded less crazy in his head.

"M... mom... my..." The little girl mumbled, and just then, someone stepped out from between the gnarled dead trees in the middle of the Primeval Jungle.

Someone with pupil-less violet eyes, blazing with motherly fury, shoulder length violet hair whipping around her face because of an invisible wind, and a hand raised in his direction.

Only three thoughts ran through Adventurer's mind at that moment:

One:  _So she's why Tiger Lily warned me away from here._

Two:  _Oh my god she's beautiful._

And three:  ** _Oh my god. I'm so fucking BONED._**

-=-

She let him down after a few minutes of holding him upside down, glaring holes into his face, and, unbeknownst to her, shooting him straight through the heart repeatedly.

"He promised to protect me... don't hurt him..." The little girl - whose name he learned was Onion - whispered to her, tugging on her skirt. Thank god for Onion, the sweet girl, because the older woman seemed to actually be listening to her. Soon, he found himself flat on his rear on the ground, and as the woman bent down to pick up Onion in her arms, he found the strength to ask, "So... come here often?"

She didn't look impressed at all. "We live here."

"... In Primeval Jungle?"

"In a mansion, a little deeper, but yes." An eyebrow rose. "You?"

It took a while before he processed it as a legitimate question. "Ah- I- I'm an adventurer. I hunt for artifacts and lost treasures, and donate them to local museums when I can. I was out here looking for the treasure of Primeval Jungle." He scratched at his cheek awkwardly. "So... there's no treasure, is there?"

The corner of her mouth quirked up in amusement. "Besides Onion? Not really." Turning around, she headed for the direction she had come from, before glancing back at him. "You're welcome to come with us, if you'd like."

"H-hah?"

"Back to the mansion. Unless you'd like to be left alone in this jungle." Was she fucking  _smirking_ at him?  _Aaaaagh. May the gods take the fucking PRNDL or smite him where he stood, he was so fucking BONED._ "I don't think Onion would let me leave you alone, anyway, but if that's what you want-"

"No, no, I'll- I'll go with you two!" Scrambling to his feet, Adventurer tried to straighten himself out, dusting off Backpacky - who was choking on something - , before jogging after the mother and daughter combo, following them through the dusty old path that seemed to reveal itself to the ethereal maiden. "Say, uh, speakin' of which... what was that?"

"What was what?"

"That... thingy, you did. That made me float."

"Telekinesis."

"Teleki _what now._ "

"... Floaty floaty power." The woman smirked again, and Adventurer physically felt his heart do an acrobatic fucking pirouette out of its usual spot and straight to his butterfly-filled stomach.  _Son of a bitch. Son of a bitch. I am so boned._ "I'm not in control of it, not very well, anyway. My brother has more of a grasp on anything magical, anyway, and this could count."

 _... Magical?_ "Magical? What d'you mean?"

As the trio stopped in front of a cluster of briars, the woman placed a hand over them, making the thorny briars curl away to reveal an entrance, which they passed through. Once they passed through it, Adventurer choked back an awed gasp as a mansion loomed above them, nearly blocking out the moonlight. "Holy shit."

"Language." Onion chided, and the woman actually  _laughed_ at that. Her laugh, to Adventurer, had a honeyed lilt to it - one that made his heart go pitter-patter. He cursed his weak heart. "No bad words in the house. Mommy said so."

"That's right, Onion." Her mother pressed a kiss to her cheek before gesturing for Adventurer to follow. "Come in, and don't mind the ghosts. Onion isn't afraid of the ones in the house, but the ones outside the mansion scare her to death. The ones in here helped me raise her, after all."

"Yeah... okay..." Adventurer was about to follow when Backpacky hiccuped up something into his hands. "... A rose?"

"Is that for Mommy?" Onion asked, and despite himself, Adventurer actually flushed with embarrassment, shoving the rose back into Backpacky. "Aw."

"What was for me?" The woman asked, turning to look at him.

Adventurer shook his head wildly. "N-nothing! Let's just- let's just go in now, okay?"

"... Suit yourself." And with that, she knocked on the door three times. "We're home."

_CRASH!_

"... What was that?" Adventurer asked, mainly out of concern.

The woman groaned. "That... might have been my brother and his friends. Be careful, he likes to greet guests with card tricks."

 _... Wait a fucking minute._ Realization dawned in his eyes as the door swung open.  _No fucking way. Bullshit._

"Hey there, Blackberry, Onion, Ad-" The sounds of card shuffling immediately stopped.

Adventurer swore. Loudly.

And then he lunged right for Cinnamon's throat.

-=-

"You fuckers knew! You KNEW!"

"We did." Vampire clarified.

"HE KNEW! SHE KNEW! HE KNEW! YOU ALL KNEW!" Blackberry watched with amusement as Adventurer pointed accusingly at all his friends, seated in the living room, while Onion played with Ghost Butler. The adventurer looked like he was having a crisis. "YOU ALL KNEW! YOU WERE ALL IN ON THIS!"

"We were." Mint Choco smiled.

"YOU!" He pointed at Cinnamon. "YOUR SISTER!"

"Blackberry's my sister, yes." Cinnamon grinned.

"YOU DIDN'T THINK TO TELL ME YOU HAD A SISTER?!"

"I thought you already knew. I've mentioned her so many times."

"AAAGH!" Adventurer growled in frustration before slumping down on a sofa. "This isn't funny, nor fair. So there was no treasure after all."

Cocoa raised her mug knowingly to her lips. "I don't know, Adventurer. It seems like you found the treasure, though." She winked at him, and, confused, he cocked his head to the side. Cocoa's gaze immediately flitted to Blackberry's face - much to her confusion - , and immediately, Adventurer's face colored, understanding  _exactly_ what she meant. He pulled his hat down to hide the blush on his face as Cinnamon leaned against Mint Choco, petting Cinnamon Bunny idly as Cocoa giggled, pleased. "See? You found it. This wasn't an unfruitful exploration after all!"

"I hate you." Adventurer grumbled.

"No you don't." Cocoa threw back cheerfully.

"I don't understand." Blackberry raised an eyebrow. "Is there a joke I'm missing here?"

Cinnamon grinned up at his boyfriend before winking at his older sister. "We'll tell you later, after you convince Adventurer to stop hiding under his hat."

"You. I hate you too." Adventurer mumbled under his hat. Cinnamon chortled with laughter.

Blackberry moved in front of him before lifting his hat slightly, revealing his red face, which only turned redder at her proximity. "Will I learn what all this laughing at your expense is about at some point, perhaps?"

"... Maybe." Adventurer squeaked. "You're too close."  _NOT CLOSE ENOUGH!!!_

Blackberry raised an eyebrow, and  _oh my fucking god did she actually lean even closer? The minx! This beautiful, smirking, telekinesis using minx!_ "Too close?"

" _Yes!_ " Adventurer yelped, pulling his hat back down to cover his face. He was  _never going to live this down_.

Cinnamon actually cackled, falling out of his chair at his (mis)fortune. The little shit. "Oh my god."

"You shut up!" Adventurer pointed at his direction. "You shut up right there!"

"I'm not saying anythiiiiing~!" Cinnamon sang before laughing again at Adventurer's expense. He wanted to throttle the magician. Preferably with his lasso. In the middle of one of his goddamn performances. Make him perform a fucking Houdini if he could.  _Stupid lousy Cinnamon and his stupid lousy minty fresh toothpaste boyfriend and their stupid lousy cocoa drinking best friend and their stupid lousy grape drinking vampire buddy-_

A bell rang, long and loud, from somewhere above the mansion.

Blackberry moved away from Adventurer, much to his relief and disappointment, and looked up. "... It's dinner time." To Cinnamon and the others, she said, "You all know where you usually stay." and to Adventurer, she asked, "Do you want to stay for dinner?"

"Would you like to stay forever?" Cinnamon asked teasingly. Blackberry socked him in the arm with her candle holder. "Ow!"

"..." Adventurer looked at his group of friends, then towards Blackberry, and then towards Onion, who had stopped playing to look up at him, almost imploringly.

_Aw hell._

"Dinner would be great." He gave Blackberry the most suave smile he could muster at the moment, taking off his hat to run his fingers through his hair. "Mind if I leave my hat here in the meantime? T'ain't proper to wear a hat to dinner."

"That is fine." Blackberry replied softly, and with a soundless swish of her skirts, she was already taking off for the doors to the room to lead them out to the dining room.

... He might have been imagining it, but he could've sworn he saw her blushing.

The thought made Adventurer smile.


End file.
